In light of the "cock au vin" story , here is my guide to what not to do with your penis. Pictures of the engorged members of members of parliament will leak. Look at Peter Dowling, the Queensland politician who dunked his in a glass of wine. This is a terrible waste of wine. What's more it was red, so it must have looked as if there'd been some sort of accident. I guess white wine may resemble formaldehyde. Either way, it's not a good look. As Anthony Weiner found, sexting is best left to teenagers, who at least know what Snapchat is. Clearly the female "gaze" has changed and some women like this sort of thing. Why say it with flowers when you can say it with a quick shot of your erection under the desk?
Why you should care
So yes, women are visual too. So why is it that female nudity is considered automatically sexy, while a dick pic all too often feels embarrassing, awkward, gross, or funny? Is it the difference between how the male and female brain perceive bodies? Or is it down to the objective attractiveness of male and female bodies? Are penises aesthetically sexy? Are they physically attractive? Are all dick pics doomed to inspire zero lust? They are veiny, knobbly and generally quite weird. Some are nicer than others, but most are fairly unpleasant to look at.
Okay, straight up. Do you find penises visually appealing?
Back dimples. I know girls who are nuts about them, but I could go either way. I know, I know.
When I was in my 20s, the bar I worked at hosted an open mic for musicians, and Matt was one of our regulars. He was tall, broad, unfailingly polite and he sang Tom Waits covers. That was a super-hot combination and one night when I got off my shift a little early, we had some drinks and I took him home.